


to the stars, we are nothing but dust

by melon_water



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-29 10:07:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19017736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melon_water/pseuds/melon_water
Summary: in which mingyu talks about wonwoo.“i truly loved him, i swear i did.”





	to the stars, we are nothing but dust

❝ i had known him since middle school. he was always so quiet and intimidating. he seemed so brooding till you got to know the little nerd within him. 

it's so amusing to think he hated me at first. i always annoyed him on library day while he was reading. when he'd look up at me from his book across the table, the anger was almost tangible. he taught me that word in 6th grade. i only bothered him because i admired him and his smarts. it was the typical thing where the boy is mean to the girl because he likes her yet i didn't romantically like him then. 

one day though, when i said hello to him he closed his book and said hello back. it was so unlike him. i was honestly taken aback but i recovered quickly and attempted to start a conversation; he responded to every sentence i said. after that, he'd respond to me every library day. 

we soon started sitting by each other at lunch. it took me a long time to convince him to handle me for that long but he did in the end. anytime he'd take his glasses off to clean them, i'd steal a fry or a grape off of his tray. when he'd put his glasses back on he'd just go back to whatever we were doing before. i think he eventually caught on to me but didn't say anything. it seemed to impress people that i was his friend and we were close much less. 

when we got paired together for a project, it was the first time we had seen each other out of school. our parents met and talked while we ran off to each other's rooms to start working. even when we were done with the project, we still begged our parents to let us go to the other's house. 

by the end of our 7th grade year, we were best friends. we worked together on every project, paper, and report. we stayed at each other's houses almost every weekend. during the summer we practically lived at the pool. 

in the 8th grade, we had figured out our places. i had made other friends and so did he. yet as all best friends should be, we were still just as close as we could be. when sports season came around i played soccer and he'd come to every single home game i played. yet, things got messy when girls started liking me. 

i thought i liked one so when she confessed i said yes. that ended as soon as it started. when she kissed me on our second date i knew i wasn't into it. i think after 3 girlfriends i realized maybe ladies weren't for me. it was about this time that i guess i started getting closer to another guy on the soccer team, minghao. he was very open about his sexuality and it surprised me. he had moved from china as a young boy to south korea so he wasn't so aware of the unsupportive culture here. he didn't mind the stares he got and such so i went to him for help. in the end, he told me i was probably gay. i didn't think about too much until high school. 

god, where do i begin here? wonwoo and i still spent a lot of time together and older guys would tease us for being so close and call us, i hate this word, faggots. we didn't mind at first but soon wonwoo told me he actually liked boys and it made him uncomfortable. i instantly was supportive and understanding because, well, i like them too. 

things were kind of awkward after wonwoo told me about his sexuality. i didn't tell him about mine until sophomore year. when i did, i knew had developed feelings for him after all these years. i was scared but did it anyway. apparently, he told me this himself, he had liked me for a very long time and only told me he liked boys because of his feelings for me.

one night we were extremely wasted and ended up confessing our feelings for each other and we kissed or something. the next morning we both knew we had to talk it over. we were drinking coffee and talking about it when wonwoo told me he wished he could've told when he was sober. i suggested we wait about a day then formally confess. 

the next day wonwoo told me to meet him in the park when it was dark. when i showed up i couldn't help but cackle at him. he was wearing sunglasses. when i walked up to him he threw them off and said to me, 'you might think the fact that i was wearing sunglasses was ridiculous, but the fact that we aren't together is more ridiculous.' after he said that he winked at me. i literally doubled over in laughter and called him 'the most adorable dork ever.' 

of course, i said yes so we dated for the rest of high school even though we were looked at funny or teased by guys who slap each other's asses on a daily. 

our relationship carried on throughout the entirety of high school and college. we always found ways to see each other on breaks and called during any free time. overall these years we had discovered all of our current best friends. seungcheol, jeonghan, jisoo, seokmin, minghao, junhui, jihoon, soonyoung, hansol, seungkwan, and chan. funny enough almost all of our friends ended up dating each other. we were as close as thirteen people could be. 

after college, wonwoo and i decided to save up enough money and move in together. we were able to save enough for a months rent at a place quite soon. that became home for us; our small apartment in the bustling city of seoul. 

one of my favorite memories is probably when i proposed to him. it was honestly the best thing i'd ever done. hidden within the pages of a thrifted copy of his favorite book was the ring. we were at a nice dinner since it was our anniversary and for his gift, i gave him the copy of the book. when he was flipping through it stopped on the pages with that cut-out hole for the ring. when he looked up at me he was smiling so brightly and it was gorgeous. he held it up and chuckled. he then said, 'oh mingyu, what's this? are you asking me to marry you?' i just laughed and told him, 'of course i am, i love you.' he slid the ring across the table and told me to be really cliche and get down on one knee in front of the entire restaurant and of course, for him, i did it. 

another memory i adore is a bit of an old one. all the way back to freshman year. junhui was wonwoo's second best friend and minghao was mine. they told us everything about how much they liked each other, so wonwoo and i being the great friends we are, set them up. we had it all planned out. we were gonna tell them to meet us at a certain place and they would be left there by themselves and then they would be forced to talk to each other while we were staked out in the shop across the street. of course, though, it was a plan made by me and wonwoo so it backfired horribly. as soon as they saw each other they ran away. literally ran away from each other. for the next week they were so awkward around each other and couldn't even look each other in the eyes. we then just had to resort to forcing them to tell each other how they feel. 

it was such a nice time for us until he started getting sick. it was horrible. so painful for all of us but the most painful for him. i would stay with him in the hospital and every moment i wasn't there i was at home doing as much work as i could to afford to pay the hospital bills. it was a few months into the treatment when the doctors said it wasn't working. i think it affected me more than it did him. at this point, i had given up working just to spend time with the love of my life. 

seeing him break down before me in that sickening hospital was the worst experience of my life. yet, i'm not standing up here to make you cry. i'm standing here to make sure that you all knew that while to maybe some of you he was just jeon wonwoo, the guy with glasses and a resting bitch face, to me he was jeon wonwoo. my husband, the love of my life, and the one thing i've been this devastated over. 

it's been a few months since he passed away and i always think back to what he told me before he took his final breath. 

'kim mingyu, i love you. don't get too stuck on me okay, because

to the stars, we are nothing but dust.'❞

as mingyu finished his obituary for his husband the audience that was seated before him was in tears. he felt his own eyes welling up at the thought that wonwoo wouldn't be by his side again.  his eyes scanned the crowd of his family, wonwoo's family, and their friends. he made eye contact with wonwoo's mother and she smiled so brightly at him. with that he broke down and let the tears fall. 

everyone noticed that mingyu had finally broken down. reliving his beautiful memories with wonwoo drained as much power from him as the actual death did. junhui stood up and made his way to mingyu to pull him into a big hug. he whispered in mingyu's ear with a smile, "you know wonwoo wouldn't want you to cry." mingyu just chuckled through the tears and his breaths were shaky. minghao stood and went up to join the hug. everyone began following and soon they were all stood upon the slightly lifted stage in a pile of people hugging. 

when everyone pulled away mingyu was still crying, yet he had a smile on his face. 

at that point, he had realized that although wonwoo wouldn't be by his side again, he'd have the memories and words they had. and of course, the fact that they truly are just little specks of dust within the huge universe.

so with a smile he said to those gathered around him, "i truly loved him, i swear i did. and he was right; something as big as a person to us, is just as small as a speck of dust in comparison to the entire world around us."

**Author's Note:**

> aah i hope you enjoyed this! and thanks for reading it. honestly i didn’t really like it that much but posted it anyway !!
> 
> i published this on my wattpad but i’m posting things here as well in case of an issue with wattpad. please leave some kudos or criticism in the comments :)


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